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The Fallen Housewife... Redeemed!

PLEASE NOTE:
This is a lengthy article as the Lord gave me many scriptures to back up all that he has given me to say. Please read it through and look up the scriptures for yourself to see just what the Lord say about this weighty subject!

PROVERBS 31:10-31
The Wife Of Noble Character

  1. A wife of noble character who can find?
    She is worth far more than rubies.
  2. Her husband has full confidence in her and lacks nothing of value.
  3. She brings him good, not harm, all the days of her life.
  4. She selects wool and flax and works with eager hands.
  5. She is like the merchants ships, bringing her goods from afar.
  6. She gets up while it is still dark; she provides food for her family and portions for her servant girls.
  7. She considers a field and buys it; out of her earnings she plants a vineyard.
  8. She sets about her work vigorously; and her arms are strong for her tasks.
  9. She sees that her trading is profitable, her lamp does not go out at night.
  10. In her hand she holds the distaff and grasps the spindle with her fingers.
  11. She opens her arms to the poor and extends her hands to the needy.
  12. When it snows, she has no fear for her household; for all of them are clothed in scarlet.
  13. She makes coverings for her bed; she is clothed in fine linen and purple.
  14. Her husband is respected at the city gate, where he takes his seat among the elders of the land.
  15. She makes linen garments and sells them, and supplies the merchants with sashes
  16. She is clothed with strength and dignity she can laugh at the days to come.
  17. She speaks with wisdom, and faithful instruction is on her tongue.
  18. She watches over the affairs of her household and does not eat the bread of idleness.
  19. Her children arise and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praises her:
  20. "Many women do noble things, but you surpass them all."
  21. Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting; but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised.
  22. Give her the reward she has earned, and let her works bring her praise at the city gate.

 

As I read these scriptures, I see just how far from God I truly am. I am a controlling, manipulative woman who does not SUBMIT to God or man (James 4v 1-12, 1 Peter 2 v 13-21), particularly my husband, through these verses, my eyes are opened to the shame I have brought upon my husband through my disrespect and disobedience, through my unwillingness to control my tongue and just plain-old shut up!

(James 3v 1-12) Women have this misconception that they always have to have something to say, an opinion for everyone to hear, whether they want to hear it or not, it never occurs to some women that no-one really gives a damn what they have to say and that most of the things pouring out of their mouths is pure lies and nonsense. They fail to realize that most men don't care about what they are saying because they cannot relate to what it is they are saying, and that most women can't stand a blabber mouth because no-one can get a word in edgewise around them, don't be the woman people roll their eyes at in a "here we go again, where's the ear plugs" kind of way; be the woman of few, choice, wise, well thought out words, the woman people actually like to listen to, because it's only every now and then, not all the time and then some.

PROVERBS 31 v 10.
A wife of noble character who can find?
She is worth far more than rubies.

This verse explains to us women what a Wife Of Noble Character is, at first those words make it sound like a status completely unobtainable, it makes you want to give up while there is still time doesn't it!

Well don't lose heart, I have read those scriptures many times, in the search to get others off my back out the way I behaved, finally, I changed my heart attitude, changed my desire to match that of the Lord's, I desired to know their meaning because it was obvious to me that this was a lifestyle pleasing to my God. Finally, they made sense to me, they made life seem a lot easier. Apparently, I didn't have to make all the hard choices and decisions, I didn't have to be in control and when I realized I didn't always have to have something to say to be noticed. My husband loved me just as much with my mouth closed; as he did when it was running a million words a minute.

V10. Says a wife of noble character is hard to find and worth far more than rubies, the reason they're hard to find is because women stopped listening to what God was telling us He wanted us to be which you can find in 1 Peter 3v 1-7: Submissive with purity and reverence before God and to your husband, Inner beauty that does not fade, Gentle, with a Quiet Spirit which is of great worth in God's sight, Modest, Showing wisdom through words and actions, to be diligent in caring for our God given No. 1 priority, our home and those who reside in it.

Instead of this pure and simple way, we have turned our ear to the world and have heeded the lies it spews forth, that our careers are more important than our loved ones (God never said you could not have a job, He just never intended it to become the most important aspect of your life). The way we dress now leaves nothing to the imagination of any passer by who can now see down you blouse, up your skirt or dress and be able to tell what kind of underwear you have on because what you are wearing is so tight it looks painted on. The world tells us that it's OK to speak your mind and do anything you want to do without thinking of how it will affect those around you. Thanks to these lies, the gentleman is now obsolete, he can no longer open doors, give us his coat when it's cold, help us with our luggage etc. Apparently it's discrimination, it never occurred to us women that there where some jobs and tasks God never intended us to perform, it's not to say we can't do them, He just didn't design them for us. We can no longer be genteel women, everything has to 50-50, we are told it's good to remind your husband, and lover, that you earn more money that he does, that it's OK to keep your money separate in your own private account. That it's fine to degrade him in front of other men and women by fighting with him in public or giving him hell when you get home because he took two breaths without asking your permission first, withholding sex from him as punishment, we are told to train our husbands like they are dogs, to have him jump every time we snap our fingers, we have become witches, nothing more than spoiled brats who throw tantrums when we don't get our way.

Well, I could go on, you know really drag out the list of things that we will be confronted with and accused of at the judgment seat of God, but if you haven't got the picture by now, you needn't bother reading anymore. By listening to the father of lies, we have allowed our once easy lives to become burdensome and through acceptance of these false ideals of living, we have made for ourselves a veritable war zone in our own homes, our supposed refuge from the outside world, the place intended for only those whom you love and who love you in return.

Our children suffer from the constant struggle for control of the home, they lose respect for those in authority, and they find it difficult to compromise or even just let things go, forgive and forget. Instead of being a support and help meet to our husbands, we tear them down to build ourselves up, ask yourself this, if you truly love your husband, shouldn't your desire be to see and help him succeed in all he does both in work and leisure, for the good of all in your home and the happiness and well being there in?

PROVERBS 21v 9 & 25 v 24
(This scripture is repeated word for word, odd don't you think? Then again, maybe not!)
Better to live on a corner of the roof than share a house with a quarrelsome wife.

Just because someone throws out the bait, it doesn't mean you have to take it! You will never hear of a one sided fight, it takes two! Bite your tongue, resist with love the urge to snap back, gently seek out the cause of the upset and a way to smooth things over, don't be ridiculous and lock yourself in a room or be childish and throw things, you love this man, remember! Be submissive and obedient, supportive and loving, and there should not be any reason to fight at all, true, we are only human, but life in Christ gives us the ability to stop a disagreement in its tracks and take all cares to the Father.

PROVERBS 31v 11
Her husband has full confidence in her and lacks nothing of value.

Can your husband trust you with the finances? Can he trust you to fulfill you duties around the house? Is he paying off an endless credit card debit? Do you binge on food, shopping and exercise; are you irresponsible with the body Christ has given you? Do you tailor your body to your husband and his likes, or do you try and shove it into the mold provided by the devil via magazines, movies and other women?

Do you dress as one who treasures herself in a holy way, and treat your body as sacred to your husband alone? You wouldn't want him showing his penis to every woman he meets, why would he want you showing your breasts, cleavage, stomach, hips and behind to every male you walk past, he's the only one who needs to know what you have! If it excites you and makes you feel good to have other men look at you with lust in their eyes you have committed adultery and you are outside the kingdom of God!

(I can write these things because I have been guilty of all of them, I have since confessed these things to my husband and family and I have also repented to God and sought His forgiveness also. So as you can see, you are not the only ones, and it is easy to fix, confess your sins one to another and repent to God in earnest, and don't go back to your sin.)

Are you valuable to him through your love, support and modesty, the fact that you don't cheapen yourself before him? How is your prayer life together; do you confess your sins one to another, he won't judge you, he's human too, do you respect him and his decisions, do you let him have the first and last words every time? Do you make a fool of him at all, this man you love? How is your sex life, do come together selfishly only for your own gratification? Or do you desire nothing more than to give each other the most pleasurable experience of love making and satisfaction you can, expecting nothing in return, letting the Lord God through prayer, the one who gave us the gift of making love show us and guide us, the Word is pretty clear on the one thing (Sodom and Gomorrah) you are forbidden to do, the rest is up to you what you are and aren't comfortable with, open up to your husband and him to you, enjoy each other to the fullest.

PROVERBS 31v 12
She shall bring him good not harm all the days of her life.

Well this one is pretty self-explanatory; the best way I have found to do this is to first shut my mouth and think of the consequences of what I am about to say or do. You know, ask myself a few important questions like: What good will it do? Does it even need to be said or done? If so, who to? And so on.

PROVERBS 31v 13
She selects wool and flax and works with eager hands.

Do you work with eager hands and find joy in all you do knowing that it is one less thing for your husband to worry about and one more thing he is thankful that you do for him. Or, do you make him wish he had never met you because you can't even get him a drink without complaining. Are you to him an oasis where he can experience genuine love and give it freely in return, or are you a dead weight around his neck, a tiresome burden he wishes to escape? 

PROVERBS 31
v 14. She is like the merchants ships, bringing her goods from afar.
v 15. She gets up while it is still dark; she provides food for her family and portions for her servant girls.

How is your cooking? Do you cook only what you like to eat? Did you ask his mother who cooked for him all his life how to make his favorite dishes? (How is your relationship with his mother, do you make it a hassle for him to go and see his own parents, either with or without you, is it impossible for him to spend quality time with them alone?)

If you are a bad cook, why haven't you learned how, or asked for help? At least attempt to improve, it's true, some women can't cook to save their lives, but at least he will know you gave it your best shot and love you more for it! Would you lovingly make him the coffee he asks for even though he's standing right in front of the coffee maker? Just to show him that there is nothing you wouldn't do for him. Or do you call him lazy and tell him to get it for himself! You are missing a wonderful opportunity for him to thank God that he chose you over any other women. Will you go to any lengths to reassure him that no task is too great or too small and that no matter what he asks he can rest assured that it would be done.

PROVERBS 31v 16
She considers a field and buys it; out of her earnings she plants a vineyard.

She considers, she thinks, she weighs up the pro's and con's, she seeks good counsel, then she acts, she does not jump in head first, there was no impulse buying, no carefree frivolity with household funds, but thought and wisdom and self-control were exercised so that her actions brought about prosperity for her home.

"out of her earnings she plants a vineyard."

Earnings does not always refer to a monetary reward, in this verse earnings refers to the time she sets aside to devote wholly to God, her reward is her communion and the refreshing that can only come from God, be it 5 minutes here and there or set hours throughout the day. These moments where you commit yourself to touching base with the Lord are vital to help you keep your peace, to keep you refreshed and ready to serve, not just your husband and children, but others in need that the Lord brings in to your life for you to meet and bless, for what good are deeds done for those we can return the favor, for this reward is earthly, look for the opportunity to bless where the only possible reward is that of a heavenly nature.

The vineyard referred to is also a spiritual one, her time with the Lord allows her to plant trees that will produce good fruit in keeping with the Spirit enabling her to become more of what the Lord wants her to be, having more of the spiritual qualities the Lord desires her to have.

You'll notice I said trees, not tree. Her time with the Lord not only causes her own tree to grow and produce spiritual fruit, it also enables her to plant the seed of God's love into those around her, and those seeds over time will grow. The Lord used the word vineyard for a reason, He wasn't talking about just her, He was also speaking of those who witness her living and by example they too learn how to live according to God's word, her children see her obedience to her husband's commands and her respect and love for him, they see the wisdom and self-control she uses to deal with every situation AND as children learn by example, they to will grow and have these vital qualities firmly planted within them (Proverbs 22 v 6). Other women see the joy she has in a loving home where there is no strife or quarrelling and no one always having to have the last word. She is not burdened with having to make the hard decisions (this is not to say that women are unable to make decisions, it's as simple as this, women think emotionally and men think logically, we cry and get all flustered, men examine the facts, we'll believe anything, men are skeptics, try to deny it but you know it's the truth!). Our husbands love being respected as a man, he loves that he can trust his wife who is feminine, gentle, loving, wise, has a quiet spirit and who thinks before she speaks, his wife who does not undermine his authority and most importantly, he loves the her because she is his encouraging support who takes care of the home and children, who finds JOY in it and does NOT COMPLAIN, his wife who is a God-given HELP MEET, not co-advisor who makes his life miserable because he can never seem to make her happy or please her.

A word of encouragement for those of you whose husbands are as of yet unsaved, please read 1Peter 3 v 1- 2 and take heart. Be of good cheer, through you, a living witness of Christ's love and blessings, God will get them in the end. Even when the going gets tough, praise God and keep going, don't speak badly of your husband either to him or behind his back, by doing so you are going against the authority you are subjected to.

If your husband is abusive, seek legal assistance through the police! The Lord does not take any pleasure in seeing you mistreated this way!

Just remember all things work out for good, just allow Jesus to be your Lord and Savior, let Him take control and the pressures of your life will disappear, do not take on burdens that don't belong to you, the Lord said to lay them at the foot of the cross and walk away free indeed, a new creation, washed in his blood, with his chosen protector, your husband filled with the Holy Spirit to guide you and care for your needs as your help allows him to provide for his family and most importantly to devote his time to being about his heavenly Father's business.

SEE - Good fruits, a whole vineyard full of spiritually productive people pleasing their Lord.

PROVERBS 31 v 17
She sets about her work vigorously; and her arms are strong for her tasks.

She sets about her work vigorously, and gets it done, there is no complaining or loud sighs of displeasure or heel dragging mentioned, it also does not say JUST housework, work is also your ministry or calling as well as visiting the elderly, the sick, (and only if directed by the Lord, visiting the incarcerated) opening your heart, arms and doors to those in need and yes your wallet or purse too MATTHEW 25 v 34 - 46. The bible says life is a race to the finish, a race for the crown 1 CORINTHIANS 9 v 24- 27, how do you expect to win the crown if you never pick up the pace, forget about yourself and concentrate on the name of the Lord?

Does all this sound overwhelming? Well don't let it discourage you, the Lord knows your limitations, He knows how much you can handle, better than you do! The scripture tells us her arms were STRONG for her tasks, her tasks were easy for her to fulfill, because she was eager, she had a good attitude of heart and mind and a desire to see her work completed.

If you have too much on your plate, it's because YOU put it there not God, and certainly not you husband, we women have a tendency to try to do too much to prove that we CAN do it all, and we usually just end up with egg on our faces OR you have bad organizational skills, either way, if you are having trouble getting everything you NEED to get done in a day complete, go to your husband, be HONEST with him and do not get DEFENSIVE, he LOVES you remember, seek his wisdom, have him help you work out a schedule even! That way your work gets done and you are available when your husband needs you, be flexible (something I have trouble with, I can't stand mess, the Lord gave me a one year old to help fix that) don't get so locked into a routine that you miss what God has planned for you for the day!

If you are just plain old lazy, PULL YOUR THUMB OUT and become useful before you get kicked to the curb and your husband gets a housekeeper! Don't be such a burden, the first thing God said concerning women, the first time women are even mentioned is in GENESIS 2 v 18 The Lord God said, "It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him." Also referred to as a 'help meet' in the King James Version. We are to help, not hinder! And certainly NOT sit back and enjoy the ride or live out your own hidden agenda.

In a marriage there should be no hidden agenda, if you love each other you will both have the desire to see each other succeed and fulfill life long dreams and ambitions AND also have someone JUST as happy as you to see it come to fruition. You both should (through good communication a key to a wonderful marriage, that will see you through many storms) know what the other wanted out of life and work together towards achieving them as the Lord allows, compromise, Oops, there I said the C word, if your lifestyle does not allow you to do all you have in heart, talk it over together, pray and seek the Lord's wisdom, his peace and His joy, he most likely has better things planned than you could ever dream up. Thanks to Him, my husband and I have a beautiful daughter and I am the proudest aunt in the world, I have a handsome cutie pie nephew, and my nieces, don't get me started, angels from above! You will be surprised how they change the way the whole world looks; they make it sweeter, like rose colored glasses.

PROVERBS 31 v 18
She sees that her trading is profitable, her lamp does not go out at night.

TRADING can be replaced with 'all she does' and the definition of PROFITABLE in the Hebrew is:

To do well, to be pleasing, good, pleasant, beautiful, excellent, lovely, delightful, joyful, precious, cheerful, kind, correct, righteous, that which is good, right, virtue, happiness, pleasantness. Refers to practical or economic benefits, wisdom, aesthetic or sensual (sense) goodness. Used in the context of seeking for the ultimate purpose in life.

All of the above refers to how you receive your neighbor, the unexpected guest when you are using all eight arms on ten jobs. The general feel of your home is it like and ice box or a warm hearth, do visitors feel they can relax are they at ease or do you follow them with a dust buster? How do you complete the jobs given to you, the attitude of your heart as you go about them? MOST IMPORTANTLY, it shows you the qualities that should shine forth the brightest as you go about the Lord's business, both in his joy and when you partake of his suffering 1 PETER 4 v 12- 19, it is most important to rejoice in suffering, that you are counted worthy to suffer for His name sake through persecution and public ridicule even to the shedding of blood HEBREWS 12 v 4- 12 and ROMANS 8 v 35- 39. Please note the difference between suffering and discipline or tempering of ones faith and for spiritual growth. Financial hardships and times of distress, in these times run to the Lord, our Heavenly Father in obedience to His word and submit to all he sees fit for you to endure.

1 JOHN 3 v 22
And whatsoever we ask, we receive of Him, because we keep His commandments, and do those things that are pleasing in His sight.

Everything you do, every thought taken captive, if done unto the Lord as a sacrifice of joy, that you joyfully and lovingly do everything from brushing your teeth, to being unselfish in your love making with your husband, to your private and married prayer life, all these things are greatly pleasing to God and are profitable to you both here on earth and in heaven in regards to your heavenly reward.

"Her lamp does not go out at night."

For a better understanding of this please turn in your bibles to MATTHEW 25 v 1-13, the parable of the Ten Virgins.

This is first and foremost an admonition to ensure that you are doing everything within your powers to secure your salvation. Secondly it is an admonition to be wise in all your dealings, to seek heavenly wisdom and to plan ahead, you know not what or whom the Lord will send your way in need of a blessing, a word of encouragement, or prayer.

If you are watching and waiting, with your ear attuned to the Spirit of God and what he is saying, and what he intends for you to do each day, your odds of missing out on some wonderful moments greatly decrease. What an awesome thing, to be a ministering angel and to share in someone else's joys and suffering! It is also another way of telling you to be reliable, trustworthy, steadfast and competent in all that is required of you.

PROVERBS 31 v 19
In her hand she holds the distaff and grasps the spindle with her fingers.

She is diligent and always ready, willing and able to lend a hand, to jump right in, sleeves rolled up and everything. This brings us to:

PROVERBS 31v 20
She opens her arms to the poor and extends her hands to the needy.

How willing are you, both in mind and attitude of heart to take to the last dollar from your wallet or purse and place it in the hand of someone who can never repay you, without expecting it back, trusting in the Lord, knowing that he is the great provider and he will meet all your needs, the same way you meet the need of someone else through obedience unto God?

Do you really pray for those who ask for it? Or do you lie when you say you will and forget about the prayer and them five minutes after they leave your sight?

Would you ever give your car to someone if God told you to, or if you had one you were able to give freely, to someone who has a job, a wife, three kids and no means of transportation, or worse yet, someone with no job and no obligations just to bless them, trusting in God that he would provide you with another car too if you needed it, acting by faith for the glory of God?

Do not be afraid to dig deep, take people into your home if that is what the Lord is telling you both to do. To give of your love, your time, your God, His salvation, love, mercy and grace, and of your and His forgiveness.

PROVERBS 31 v 21
When it snows, she has no fear for her household; for all of them are clothed in scarlet.

She fears not for her family, for those who pass away, for her husband is a man of righteousness, her children have been brought up in the way which they should go, and she herself abides in the Lord and he abides in her.

The closest interpretation I have found for SNOW is that of whiteness, snow-white, the linen clothing of the slain, spoken of in REVELATION 7 v 13 -17, her family is clothed in scarlet, washed in the blood of the lamb, in the Old Testament, our sins were atoned for through animal sacrifice, through the crucifixion of Christ, the ultimate blood sacrifice, our sins were atoned for once and for all, to those who would accept God into their lives. She simply had no reason to fear, they were the Lord's.

PROVERBS 31 v 22
She makes coverings for her bed; she is clothed in fine linen and purple.

This to me describes a woman who treasures her marriage bed, it is sacred to her, she makes it special, a bower for her husband alone, the use of the word 'coverings' suggests that she takes great pains to keep her intimate life a secret, not giving all of her girlfriends the details down to inches, frankly, it's none of their business and they really have no need to even think of another man in bed with his wife. Don't air your private laundry where all can see, you lose some of the romance when you blab, as women can never keep anything to themselves, soon everyone knows what you do behind closed doors.

Fine linen and purple, rich apparel, they say that the clothes make the man or woman, I say it is the other way around, a woman should dress with Godly dignity, chastened, with all propriety, not showing off, but certain that if the Lord comes, he will not find them dressed shamefully, what you wear in the bedroom is another story, have fun, dress up, dress down!

PROVERBS 31v 23
Her husband is respected at the city gate, where he takes his seat among the elders of the land.

To get a full understanding of this, please turn to 1 TIMOTHY 3 v 1 - 13, this will show you what is required for your husband as a man of God, and show you that all I have written will if you apply it, help him in achieving that which the Lord desires him to have and be. We all know that the men who seem to have it all, the loving wife, the happy home, obedient children are the absolute envy of all men, they are respected and held in honor, given the position the Lord always intended men to have. Unfortunately, as we women have sinned and fallen away, our men have given up fighting us for fear of killing us to be rid of the headache, men these days are usually referred to as 'Whipped' and many other unpleasant names that I won't mention, they have no reason to hold their head high, they are not the king of their castle, and we women who elected to try and rule the roost, have forgotten or never even experienced what it is like to be treated as a queen, to be revered by our husbands as women of character and virtue, loved for all we do, and most importantly, loved for who we are, what Christ's love has made us into.

PROVERBS 31 v 24
She makes linen garments and sells them, and supplies the merchants with sashes.

She is resourceful, not looking for a hand out, determined to see her family provided for and prosperous, she tries to create a HOME not a BOUTIQUE, a place where her children can play uninhibited, where her husband can have his feet on the couch, still wearing shoes and not get an earful because of it, there is no mention of her struggling to get these things done, her day is wholly devoted to God, she is satisfied with whatever He allows her to accomplish in a day, the women in my family are very much taken with needle work, crochet, and all kinds of craft, to us it would be just the cherry on the top to sell what we make, you don't have to be craft minded, your husband might like it if you can sew on a button, mend socks etc. But it is just as well for you to have a job, something you enjoy, why should you have to work in a nightmare, before you evaluate your job and chalk it up as such, check and see if you have done all that the Lord intended you to when He put you there, or did you take the job for the pay check rather that to further the kingdom of God through godly living and ministering with tenderness and compassion to those ravaged by the world in need of Christ's love?

There are enough narky old cows in this world without your job turning you into one as well, get together with your husband, pray, the job you are in today might not be the job the Lord wishes you to be in next week, be flexible, able to go where the Spirit of the Lord blows you.

PROVERBS 31 v 25
She is clothed with strength and dignity she can laugh at the days to come.

She is clothed with strength and dignity or honor she can laugh or rejoice at the days to come.

Strength: Security, praise, might, power, strong, prevail to overcome.

Dignity - Honor: ornament of splendor, beauty, comeliness, excellency, glorious, glory, goodly, honor, majesty.

There is no designer labels mentioned, she is able to wear anything and still have that regal quality about her, she doesn't have to trowel on expensive make ups, make herself look like something she is not, her beauty is within, not skin deep, her confidence is Christ the One who makes all things beautiful in His time, like a radiant flower she blooms into a magnificent woman of Christ, humble, submissive, her husband finds beauty in both her weakness and her strength, her dignity says that she fears no man, or the opinions of the world, where they treasure up baubles and wardrobes of clothing that they can only wear once for fear of someone noticing they are wearing the same outfit they wore three months ago. She is not weighed down by these petty worries, her main concern is that her outward appearance reflect her inward one, that of a woman who does not want the world to desire her but desires to please her God, 1 TIMOTHY 2 v 9 -15 gives us a good idea of what God thinks a woman should dress like, you don't have to wear a potato sack, but you don't have to look like you fell out a magazine, perfect hair and make up, matching outfit, shoes and accessories, to spend that much time getting ready to walk out your front door is vanity and self worship, there is no room for God when you are so full of yourself. All you need to worry about is this, are you dressed in such a manner that God would have no reason to call you a hussy?

Be satisfied with not having to stand out in the crowd because the way you look makes people stop and stare like they do at a good car accident. If you're fifteen, dress like a decent fifteen year old, if you're thirty-five dress like a thirty-five year old, not like your fifteen year old daughter, you're her mother, not her older sister, don't be what you are not, you just look ridiculous and people make fun of you behind your back because you are in denial over the fact that you have aged somewhat, rather than aging with dignity and grace, you have gone kicking and screaming like a baby! Wise up!

PROVERBS 31 v 26
She speaks with wisdom, and faithful instruction is on her tongue.

How often do you open your mouth to speak and just let whatever comes to mind tumble out of your mouth? You know idle chitchat? Only to find that you made a bungling mistake and said the wrong thing to the wrong person, and you then had to spend the rest of your day either apologizing or hoping that what you said does not get back to the person you spoke about?

Faithful instruction is on her tongue, as you can see, there is not set time frame, you know, all day, not just mornings and every Tuesday afternoon, without wisdom, she does not speak, without something worth saying, that will do her listener good not harm to hear, she doesn't say anything, if it is not scriptural and correct, she does not mention it, she always has a word of encouragement, not one of discouragement. A better way to look at it is the read the King James Version of this scripture:

"She openeth her mouth with wisdom; and in her tongue is the law of kindness."

This verse shows us that without a word of wisdom, she doesn't even open her mouth let alone speak, and that her tongue is filled with kindness, not words of malice towards her brothers and sisters in Christ and words of love to those in a lost world. Her words produce good fruit, they are a blessing to hear, a seasoned word in the hour of need. She hears what the Lord wants her to say because she asks him each and every time what to say, JAMES 1 v 5-8, believing that the Lord will give her the words to speak, when she is confronted with her faith and is forced to justify her beliefs and profess the gospel, she does not fear man because she knows that God reigns in her life and that the Holy Spirit is the one who is speaking not her, she is the vessel to be used. MATTHEW 10 v 17- 20. GALATIANS 2 v 20, she has died to herself, knowing that she in her weak flesh is imperfect and that Christ who lives in her is perfect, He is the giver of all good gifts and as wisdom and knowledge are gifts of the Spirit, she is satisfied to let Him take control, allowing herself to be useful.

Unless you want the joke "some village is missing it's idiot" to be said about you every time to say anything, think before you speak, you can have fun, laugh, make jokes, just take the time to think first!

PROVERBS 31 v 27
She watches over the affairs of her household and does not eat the bread of idleness.

She is a watchtower, a lookout, she makes sure her house is in order, that everyone in her house is well provided for, that they are both spiritually and physically nourished. She also looks within herself, the house where her God resides to see that all is in order, that there is no sin or doctrine that does not align with the words of God, like a sentinel, she watches and waits upon her Lord, to see what He has in store for her, she is also watching, waiting and praying for the coming of her God, she does not eat the bread of idleness, she does not become lazy, it does not take her three weeks to get on her knees before God and give him praise and glory with all the humility and godly fear He deserves, she does not let her inner house and her family home fall into shambles and disarray, she keeps her home in order, her work is done, she is always ready to go at a moment's notice to someone's aid, she does not have to tidy her house or as the bible aptly puts it, 'bury her dead', her work is already laid to rest because it is taken care of the Lord's way, in His time, as He allows. This was my biggest problem, some nights I wouldn't go to bed till the whole house was clean because it was a mess, missing out on precious time with my husband because I did not take the control of my day away from myself and give it back to God and let Him dictate how it would play out. To see exactly what I mean, turn to ECCLESIASTES 3 v 1- 17.

PROVERBS 31 v 28
Her children arise and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praises her:

Who doesn't want their children to thank them for being a godly example of all that God desires them to be, a true mother that puts their salvation as top priority, that they know from birth that Jesus Christ is Lord of all? That the wisdom she has imparted into them has made their lives easy, it is a joy to be alive; to have a mother that they can trust will always give them godly advice, that through her obedience and faithfulness to God their needs were always met.

PRAISES: To boast, praise, celebrate, glorify, be praised, be famous, deserve praise.

How many of you women have a husband that has done any of the above things to you? How many of you are well know for simply being a good housewife, famous even, like Sarah, Abraham's wife, she called him Master, if you look up the word husband for this verse you will get this definition, Oh Yeah, some of you might not like it, but that's too bad.

HUSBAND: Owner, master, lord, possessor, husband. To me, those are the sweetest words I will ever hear, that he owns me completely, possess me, he is my security, with arms of power and love to envelope me, both in joy and sorrow, to see those arms hold his child, to have someone I love and who loves me in charge of my life to instruct me, always looking out for me, just me, no other woman to come between us, just as God planned. To know he will care for his child just as he does for me. I might not get it right every time, and sometimes my independence that my worldly family told me was good to have, well it likes to rise up and wreak havoc, but I look at my husband, I see just how much I love him, how much I trust him, the way my heart beats with pride when he speaks and there's no doubt that the Lord is speaking through him, I confess to him my pride and independence, I repent and make amends, the last thing I want is to push my husband away, not now, we've come too far, we tried so hard, we've crossed so many ravines just to be together in Christ.

PROVERBS 31 v 29
"Many women do noble things, but you surpass them all."

Many women have done great things, mighty things, powerful things, virtuous things, valiant things, but YOU surpass them all. You are the one who has given up herself that others might come first, you are the one who has sacrificed everything to put God and family first, you have risen above and you have grown, you are all that a woman of God should be, you are willing to do all that is required of you, you accept any correction with joy, you see it as a way to further perfect yourself before your God, each day dying to yourself and giving more of yourself to God.

Or in short: 'I love you and I thank God for you!'

PROVERBS 31 v 30
Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting; but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised.

A woman who fears the Lord walks in His ways, she is not false and does nothing for her own gain, knowing that her reward is in heaven and that it is better to give than to receive, that the opinion of her God and her husband are far more weighty to her life than that of the world and how it measures her up. We just read how a woman of God is praised; now let's look into the rest of this verse, uncover a few nasties if you will.

CHARM: To show mercy, kindness, be gracious, favor, grace, loveliness, charm, preciousness.

All the things pleasing to God can be misused and that's a bad thing to do.

DECEPTIVE: To cheat, to lie, deceive, fraud, something of little value, wickedness, evil, unjust, false. Denotes a way of life which goes completely contrary to God's Law, groundless words or activities which have no basis in fact or reality they aren't real- completely WORTHLESS!

What good is a plastic apple to someone dying of hunger? What good is false or feigned concern or comfort to someone in despair or mourning?

Be genuine or get out! If you are no good to anyone else because you're a big fraud, you are as good as dead and you are treading the wide, much used path to Hell along with all the other Sunday Christians, at least you're not alone right!

As you age, your beauty will leave you, what will you have then, you women who prey upon others and use your looks as a way to make a living, to make yourself feel good knowing that you are prettier than the other women you see around you, what will you do then? After you have alienated everyone you know because the sight of you and your love for yourself makes him or her sick to their stomachs? First impressions count, have you blown your opportunity to be a real person, genuine, a true friend, with compassion and concern, humble and joyful? It may be too late for some of you to change the opinion of others about you, but it's not too late to change the ways God thinks of you.

GET DOWN ON YOUR KNEES AND REPENT FOR YOUR VANITY, YOUR SELF LOVE, GIVE YOURSELF TO GOD TO BE MOLDED AS HE SEES FIT, GIVE YOURSELF UP TO HIM BEFORE HE GIVES YOU OVER TO YOUR SELFISH DESIRES FOR GOOD AND YOU GO TO HELL!!!!!!!!!!!!

PROVERBS 31 v 31
Give her the reward she has earned, and let her works bring her praise at the city gate.

This verse is the monopoly card that reads "advance to GO, COLLECT $200", congratulations on a life devoted to becoming all that God saw fit that you should become, a life of suffering, tempering, joy, blessings, love, confession, repentance, forgiveness, overcoming all that the devil has thrown at you, chasing the deeper life, the life that has meaning, life with God. You may now collect your reward, your crowns for all the souls brought to Christ because you were not ashamed to speak of your God whether people listened or not, people who witnessed you handle a moment in life that would have destroyed someone else, saw the strength that comes from above shine forth, love like a beacon, calling you to a higher life, a holy life, pleasing to God, an acceptable sacrifice to the One who gave His life for you.

To have your praises sung at the gates of heaven, WOW, what an honor, only to turn around and give all the glory back to God, knowing that without Him not one single bit of it would have been possible.

It seems like there is a long road ahead of you, but do not be deceived, you might not live more than five minutes after you read this, but that's still long enough to get your life right with God, to start afresh, a woman after God's own heart, a wife of noble character, above reproach of the world, a new creation, one who does not have to react the way she used to, dead to the ways of her old self, replacing a quick temper with patience, vanity with humility, cruelty with compassion, made new in Christ's love ready to submit, to be a blessing, even when there is no praise to be given.

I will finish with the words from a song by a music band called 3rd Day; this song really touched me, because it showed me that through true repentance and a desire to see the work started in me complete, I just might make it after all.

How many times
Have I turned away?
The number is the same
As the sand on the shore.

And how many times
You've taken me back
And now I pray you'll
Do it once more

CHORUS

Please take from me my life
When I don't have the strength
To give it away to you.
Please take from me my life
When I don't have the strength
To give it away to you Jesus.

How many times
Have I turned away?
The number is the same
As the stars in the sky

And how many times
You've taken me back
And now I pray you'll
Do it once more.

I only hope that you will learn from my mistakes and save yourselves a lot of heart ache, there are no words to describe what life is like when you have completely surrendered your life to God and submitted to your husband, the closest I can get to it is so free you could just fly, so full of everything good you could just burst. I still slip, but I try to keep my eyes on the finish line, the goal, on what I could be if I keep letting myself go, and letting more of God in, I'm not sure if I have changed enough for my husband to see yet, but I hope that in time my life and the way I am will start to repair the damage my worldly self did, I was horrid, if you have met me even a few months ago, you would have absolutely hated me, and rightly so. No-one knows you better than yourself and God, in time your husband does too, but I know what I was like, I chose to be that way, I liked it, I liked what it got me, unfortunately, I did not allow myself to see the damage I had done till it was nearly too late, I was almost reprobate and my fate sealed in hell, please remember you can only push God away so many times before He just doesn't come back, this just might be your last opportunity to turn things around for yourself, be honest, it's just you and God, and He doesn't lie nor can He be lied to!

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